On fighting with my eyeballs

You know, it's so strange.

In the daytime, I'm fighting to stay awake. At night, I'm fighting to fall asleep. There's really no in-between.

Reading has always seemed to help the falling asleep process, but I feel like now-a-days, it just wakes me up. Coffee has always helped the staying awake process, but lately it has little to no effect other than preventing my mid day caffeine-deprived headache. I've recently started visiting the new Netflix website and just dragging my mouse over the right side arrow of a category until the constant scroll of movie covers makes my eyes want to shut, which seems to work pretty well. I'm still working on a staying awake method. I'll keep you updated.

Or maybe I won't. Geez, i'm so bad at updating this.

On home visits

Going home gets more bittersweet every time. Everyone is growing up, things are changing, and I find myself unfamiliar with so many things that I once knew like the back of my hand. Seeing them is always so great, but I'm not sure leaving them is something I'll ever get used to.

On being cranky

It might be the holiday season that's put me in this mood. It might be working too much, and not getting paid enough. It might be the fact that I'm far away from my family, or losing touch with my friends, or missing out on my nephew growing up. It might be that turning twenty two this week doesn't seem that exciting, or that my work socks all have holes in them. I can't put my finger on it, but something has gotten me into a cranky rut I can't seem to climb out of. I'm going to try some relaxing. I'll keep you posted.

On nothing drastic, and requited love for snow.

It's been way too long since I've done this. I always get grumpy about the fact that not enough people look at this, but it's my own fault for not updating enough. I just forget a lot. Such is life.

I'd like to be able to come back from my unintentional hiatus with some drastic changes, but I have none to report. I've been successful so far in getting through the holiday season unscathed, and things are generally pretty calm in my life. The photo above was taken during my first snowfall here in Seattle a few weeks ago. It snowed for one whole day, and I couldn't possibly have been more excited about seeing my city all covered in white. Even when it turned into ice and I could barely keep my balance while walking to work, my love for snow remained, and still remains, unconditional. I feel it is not unrequited.

On just loving those clouds outside.

I know, I know.

I just said I was learning to appreciate summer-

but that doesn't mean I can't get excited

when the sun starts to frequent my eyes less often, right?

I just love those cloudy skies,

you already know.

On sort of appreciating summertime.

Those of you who know me, know that summer has always been my least favorite of all the seasons. Summer in Seattle hasn't changed that completely, but it's definitely made my dislike of summer shrink a little bit. When the temperatures are mild, I can appreciate the sun. I can appreciate blended margaritas, lemonade, and pineapple mango salsa (pictured above) on hot days. I can appreciate the flowers that are out, and the sailboats on the water. I can appreciate enough hours to pay my rent, even if it means dealing with tons of clueless tourists. Summer, I'm still not your biggest fan, but I sure don't mind you half as much now-a-days.

On cooking

There's something so comforting in finding something you're really good at.

Something you know will be an unwavering go-to when you feel like you're not sure about much else. At the end of the day, cooking is mine. I can sit down with a cook book and create, recreate, measure, stir, bake, fry, and sauté my heart out; knowing the end result is something I can be proud of. Something I can put my confidence into and share with others.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's healthy to toot your own horn sometimes.

Toot, toot.